Recently while chatting over a coffee and lunch in a quaint little Clapham cafe, the comment was put to me ‘You are ranting a lot, are you drunk?’ ‘No, I’m not drunk, I just think society is fucked. It’s all a load of shit. The politics, the lies, the hypocrisies. It’s all a game. Most of it isn’t even real’. ‘Um, how so?’ ‘Well, ah…. often, it’s not what is right and what is wrong, but who can explain it better. I’m not talking about law, I’m talking about the everyday, the fine art of bullshit. In the heat of the moment, the person with the best argument wins, not the person who is right, or at least sincere. So you don’t need to learn how to develop a healthy and honest perspective in life, you just need to learn how to deliver a winning argument. Don’t search for what is right or what is real, search for what is the right argument, for that which will allow the retention face. Don’t pay too much attention to what you say, just say it confidently. The most important thing is to look like you know what you’re talking about. Fuck sincerity. Fuck depth. Just learn the value of rhetoric. When style and substance do battle, style will often win, so develop your style, not your substance. To be successful, one must project an image of success. Otherwise known as bullshit, acting or wank. Embrace it and society will embrace you. Failing that, just be submissive. Lie down and preserve your strength for the off chance that something real will come along’.
‘Are you done?’
‘No damn you! Listen to what I am saying! It’s all a game. To succeed by societies standards you are expected to play the game too. To embrace its rules, its lies. None of it is real. You think this is real (pointing to surrounds)?! That’s real (pointing to 3 legged dog). The people in this game, they’re false. It’s all a façade. A game of chess. It’s all tactics and formations, a press conference. Just work out how you wish to be perceived, not who you really are, and run with that. Most people won’t know the difference’.
‘Ok, I think I get it. So you’re saying if I want to succeed in the society you speak of, I need to find the guise that will allow me to do so’. ‘Yeah, something like that. But never forget that society is… is, um, what was I saying? Shit, now I’m confused. Society… Ah fuck it’.
‘Oh yeah, society…. you wanna know what I think of society? DO YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT I THINK OF SOCIETY?! Here’s what I think of society (that’s when I picked up the plate of food and smashed it against the wall). That’s what I think of society! Fuck Society!’
In a matter of seconds, three security guards rushed to the area and forcefully ejected me from the café, my verbal tirade against society continuing as I was dragged into a black van and hastily driven away. At the time I wondered why there were so many security guards at such a quaint little cafe. Then I realised they must have been tipped off that a maverick was in the area. I know too much. They are trying to silence me.
Anyway, I am now taking a stand. To symbolise my unwillingness to conform I am going to stop getting haircuts and I am growing a beard. I am well aware that the stand I am taking is really not that much of a stand at all. Kinda like joining a Facebook group to support a cause… you’re not actually doing anything, meaning you’re not really supporting the cause, but you ‘support’ the cause anyway. That’s what I’m doing. I’m taking a stand. I wish to be removed from society and all its lies, hypocrisies and superficialities, and this beard will help me do it. Sometimes I wonder why I am so hardcore, then I remember I was just born that way.
If I could just say one last thing before I go… remember kids, keep it real. And Rock on. Shit, that was two things. Oh well.