Living life in the fast lane

Some of you will have noticed recent blog posts openly exhibiting a greater level of anger and hostility towards life. This is a symbol of me continuing to come out of my shell and make the transition from boy to man. The picture below was taken last weekend and many in the media have claimed it is an accurate depiction of the tough guy image I am gradually learning to accept, and even embrace.

Now, what I am going to do is talk you through the photograph, much like a teacher will talk students through a work of art. The keen eye will notice the sunglasses… large and gold with a highly reflective surface, generally the type that mavericks and rogue cops wear. Notice they are complemented by a silver watch. Silver and gold on a man is a show of manhood, as is driving at the extreme speed shown in the photograph. By combining speed and bling, the boy openly flaunts his strength. You will also notice the nonchalantly aggressive expression on the boys face, refusing to acknowledge the camera despite his obvious awareness of it, symbolising his cool attitude and mental strength in not getting distracted by the critics. Finally, you will notice the boys fist and middle finger being raised, most likely directed at society, symbolising the boys unwillingness to conform to the ostensible nature of its conventions.

Rather predictably, the media critics have questioned the masculinity of the boy… *stop talking in third person*… sorry, of me, by highlighting the fact this shot was taken while driving a small, light blue, feminine hatchback. Further to this, it was revealed that whenever I tried step things up a notch by changing from fourth gear into fifth, I accidentally went back into third and stalled on the busy highway, offering sorry waves to the surrounding motorists as I rode the clutch in tears.

Sadly, the last paragraph is true (apart from the tears). To these critics I simply say, look at the photo my friends, look at the photo. Thanks everyone xxx

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